July 3, 2013 –
When I was young, the one thing teachers would always ask us to do on the first day back at school in September was to write a short story about what we did on our summer vacation.
I never really had anything “exciting” to write about – no camping trips or visits to the grandparents or travels to a faraway country or day camps to learn tennis. I came from a large family and we were very poor. Both of my parents worked – my mom worked days and my dad worked nights. My travel was limited to a week away at the summer music camp sponsored by my church. For the most part, summer vacation meant trips to the local conservation area during the day with my dad for swimming, reading any kind of book I could get my hands on, or staying up late at night and watching TV. I think that I was the only person in Grade 6 who knew who Johnny Carson was. So come September, I didn’t like writing down what I did because it wasn’t exciting or an adventure. As I got older, summer vacation meant working at a minimum wage job. It meant choosing between doing small things with my family and trying to put enough money in my bank so I didn’t have to work during the school year. As a “grown up”, summer vacation meant travelling down east with my now ex-husband to visit his family. There were a couple of trips to Niagara Falls and New York City but those weren’t what I would call “adventures” and they weren’t my vacations. I was a tag-along.
So we fast forward to many, many years later and here I am with one week off and, in my mind, I didn’t do very much. So when asked how my vacation was, I immediately flashed back to those grade school days staring at the blank piece of paper trying to make swimming in a conservation area river sound “fun”.
Last week I spent time with my sister; an awesomely motivational person. We attended a conference and the theme was “I Can Do It!” My sister and I were volunteers. My sister is a volunteer junkie. She volunteers at many events in Calgary. In February she was talking about wanting to expand her sphere and she found this conference. She mentioned it to me and said “Wouldn’t it be nice if we both volunteered and got accepted? I could come visit you and we would hang out. And when you volunteer, you get to go to the conference and see all of the speakers when you’re not working. Think about it and let me know.” So I signed up too. And we both got accepted. And for the price of $40 and a commitment to work 4 hours, I was going to the conference. My sister flew into Toronto. We hung out and relaxed. She had booked a hotel room for the conference days and I got to be on vacation in my city. And she paid for everything and kept saying “This is our vacation and we’re going to enjoy it together.” And we did. She also came up with a new word “volun-cation”.
I’m still processing everything that I heard but here is what is standing out so far/the key take-aways:
- Ask yourself if you are being kind. It’s easier to be mean than to be kind but being kind goes so much farther.
- Why do we let negative people and thoughts rent space in our minds? It only fosters more negativity.
- We live in an age when the human connection and humanity are disappearing from how we live.
- Find your passion. Passion is an overused word but we need to find what we love to do – what gets our juices flowing. If your “job” is your passion, then you are very fortunate. But your job doesn’t have to be your passion. You can like/love your job. Work is not a bad thing but it’s not everything. It is okay for it to be the means to your end – to find and follow your passion.
- We cannot be replaced but our jobs can be easily filled by somebody else.
- Stop thinking and do it. Spend an hour a day doing what you want to do. Planning just causes you to “not” see the opportunities around you. Doing it will allow you to see them.
- We are programmed to be on a treadmill: go to school, get good grades, go to university, get good grades, get a good job, make money, buy a house, get a better job, make more money, fall in love, get married, start a family, make even more money, have a good career and then retire. And then we will be happy. Everything we are has been programmed into our brains from inception to age 7. And 95% of the time we act subconsciously based on this programming. But is it what we really want? And why do we wait until the end to “be happy”? We equate everything on the treadmill with happiness. But is it really?
- We can learn from our past but not be our past.
- Why does it take a life-changing situation to make us examine our lives and then decide to live our lives differently?
- You only need to change one thing at a time.
- You are in control and in charge of your life. You are the CEO of your life and you should make your choices and decisions with that attitude. Nobody questions the CEO when they make a decision – well, almost nobody.
There was a lot more and I am still processing it all. However it was an eye opener because I have been searching for balance and a more fulfilling life. I know I have to work. There is no question about that – unless I meet a sugar daddy or win the lottery (oops – I can’t do that!). So I am on the treadmill. And I cannot pick the distance – I will be working to retirement age and possibly beyond. But I am now going to pick the pace that I run on that treadmill. It’s not that I won’t be giving less than 100% because I cannot, in good conscience, do that. I still believe that I owe OLG a decent days work for a decent days pay. But the days of 150% are over. I am going to find my passion and pursue it. It may not be today or tomorrow but I will find it. And I know that I will enjoy the journey.
As children, summer vacations are about being free from the limitations of school. They’re about having fun. As we mature, they are about taking a break – a time to get re-energized. They can be a time for renewal or for new beginnings. This vacation was memorable as it delivered everything at a time when I was ready to receive.
Diary of a DOW 